Maggie Marroquin

“You’ll never amount to much. I’ll see you begging for money on the streets.” These reverberating sounds not only shattered my self-esteem, but also affected my academics. Continuously hearing phrases like these destroyed me primarily because they came from the person I cared for most: my mother. I never understood what triggered this negativity, perhaps it was because my face resembled my drug-addicted father who had forsaken us. My efforts in school were a subconscious action of my determination to have my mother acknowledge that I wasn’t a mistake, that she made the right choice of not aborting me at sixteen. We do not choose the cards we are dealt, however, we do get to choose how we use them. I allowed my mother’s behavior to affect me. In turn, I spent the beginning of high school idling time. Once I realized grades could not cultivate the relationship I desired, I stopped trying in school.

I continued with this mindset and feared colleges would also think of me as a lost cause. Growing up in South Central, I have felt this neglect and hopelessness. As a person of color, prevailing statistics say I will be pregnant by fifteen and never obtain a higher education. Everyday, I witness these stereotypes permeating the streets, becoming part of our identity. I allowed my experiences to dictate my path until I heard: "When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you'll be successful." Once those words resonated, I stopped letting others define my future and took control. I worked arduously and was motivated to cultivate successful habits. My improvement reinvigorated my desire for knowledge and ambition to earn a 4.0 GPA for my academic career. It also kindled a motivation to help others realize education is a way out of despair.

As a first generation college student, attending college always seemed like an unattainable aspiration, even more so because my continuous efforts were regularly met with resistance from others. Yet, I know receiving a higher education grants me an escape from familial troubles and gives me a sense of purpose outside of my family. I have become my siblings second-mother and have watched them grow and foster their own attitudes towards education. I am a role model for them and want them to understand my growth and aspire to be even better.  Going to college is not just to have personal success; as we toil to succeed, we must not forget to lift up those around us. It’s our duty to be catalysts of change, redefine stereotypes, and be a mentor and going to college is one of my first in beginning change. In college I will be able to surround myself with individuals, who like me, are inspired to shed a light on forgotten communities, willing to empower, and eager to paint over degrading labels and color our community with hope. My pursuit for a higher education is the bridge that links education, people, and communities together.